I am a crazy person.

I am trying to find a Marie-Pierre Arthur video I can post to express my boundless sorrow. Instead I have found this little web promo demonstrating that without knowing it I got a haircut that makes me look exactly like her.

This is great - I am the spitting image of my musical and television heroines.

Why sorrow?

- Michael Jackson is dead. I know it's probably just a cumulative thing. Enough kinna crappy things happen and the death of the King of Pop suddenly (almost) moves you to tears.

- I got into a drunk biking accident. True. I was not drunk. I was perfectly sober going at a fair clip towards the end of a narrow one way street. As I approach the corner two possibly (probably) intoxicated gentleman barrel around the corner the wrong way on my one way street. They are perhaps talking to each other, for whatever reason they do not notice me screaming for attention and braking suddenly and the guy in front bashes right into me. Pinning my leg between his tire and my crank. I have a leg that has a long tire burn on the front and rather tough-ass teethmarks in the soft part of my calf.

How did I react when the whole thing finally ground to a halt? Well, the man who had hit me, steadied himself by grabbing my shoulder. I was standing way too close to his stupid hippy beard, baseball cap and fake oakleys. With revulsion, and fear pounding in my chest, also tears again in my eyes, I picked his hand off my body like a vermin, and yelled "Don't fucking touch me!" pushed away and continued with "Watch where you're going you fucking drunks!" and pedaled shakily across the road trying to not to weep. Ah yes, the power to turn sorrow into mean anger.

I want the feeling I had a few months ago that I was making the right decision to come back with a vengeance because all that i have left right now is sadness sadness and the constant struggle not to regret choices that I can't really undo.