It takes a pretty good mechanic to avoid an earthquake

From the Globe and Mail:

"TORONTO — A trio of the Liberal Party's pre-eminent mechanics have joined the leadership camp of Toronto MP Michael Ignatieff, suggesting that a major shift is under way in the party's plate tectonics."

I personally have learned nothing 'factual' about the impending '2x the charm' race for the Liberal leadership. However, if I follow the metaphor (metaphors, multiple), than voila, a striking image of Ignatieff et al, hanging out with some dirty smocked mechanics in tents pitched on the House of Commons lawn, trying to keep a seismic shift from disturbing the parliament buildings. Yes, did I get that right?

I *rocked* OAC English, so IMHO, it's the plate tectonics that really take this sentence into the land of bad prose. C+ good effort, terrible writing.

I am reading the rest of the article now, and the writing makes the 'rivalry' between Ignatieff and Rae sound somewhere between a space-war, a soccer match, and a boyscout troops gang fight.

I am going to cut and paste the whole text here and give an annotated metaphor analysis.

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With the starting gun just sounded on the race to replace Stéphane Dion as leader, the names of Marc-André Blanchard, considered Quebec Premier Jean Charest's Mr. Fix-It; ... have appeared on the roster of Ignatieff supporters. (Mm yes, I did not actually hear a starting gun, and I didn't realize that Jean Charest employed a small motor repair expert to help him maintain his hold over Quebec.)

The three were not involved in the 2006 leadership campaign, won by Mr. Dion with Mr. Ignatieff and Toronto MP Bob Rae placing second and third respectively.( The last time I checked Canada's national government didn't give out silver or bronze medals for failing to win the party leadership.)

If Bob Rae chooses not to enter the contest, the leadership race will almost certainly turn into a cakewalk for Michael Ignatieff. (I love walking on cakes to get to the Liberal leadership it's so much more fun than stomping all over voter confidence.)

Mr. Ignatieff, 61, and Mr. Rae, 60, are said to both realize that next May's leadership convention is their last kick at the can to head the Liberal Party and potentially become prime minister of Canada.(Is it not a hallmark of bad journalism to compare the decision to enter a national leadership race to a child's street game that hasn't been played in over 50 years? Could we not write, 'last opportunity', or even 'last chance'? I think we could.)

Thus there's some comfort within the party that the men's rivalry won't turn into a clone of the guerrilla war that Paul Martin and his supporters employed against Jean Chrétien to oust him from the prime minister's office after Mr. Chrétien defeated Mr. Martin in a leadership contest.(They used cloned guerrillas to defeat Chretien? I am so confused.)

A senior party member in Toronto said Thursday that the presence of Mr. Blanchard and Mr. Guy beneath the Ignatieff tent did not indicate the two Premiers were about to give their support. Rather, he suggested it meant they were prepared “to let their militants get engaged in rebuilding the party.� (I didn't know militants were required for party-rebuilding, I thought you just had to make sure you had embedded the tent poles and pegs securely in heavy soil. No wait, I got that wrong didn't I?)

In the last leadership campaign, while Mr. Ignatieff had the most support from the parliamentary caucus and substantial backing from other segments of the party, he was unable to significantly strengthen his position and was more or less dead in the water after the first ballot.(Ahh yes, they fought on land, they fought on sea, that's where Ignatieff bit it, all his clones and his militia were busy with putting up the party-tent, and he had no Mr Fix-It, thus no-one was on hand to throw Ignatieff a life-vest.)

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I think we're done here.

Oh if you havent had enough here is the full-text.