Archive - Jan 2008

Two quotes from articles read while traveling to Toronto, one from the New Yorker, and one from Readers Digest.

From "Cult of Celebrity" Readers Digest, February 2008:

"A 2005 study ... found that monkeys would give up food to stare at photos of dominant monkeys in their group. The theory is that, for survival and procreation, less powerful monkeys need to be tuned into all the social information about those at the centre of attention."

SO THIS ONE TIME I'M OUT IN MY NEIGHBOR'S DRIVEWAY WITH MY BEST FRIEND KYLE AND HE'S TEACHING ME HOW TO RAISE A PUCK. WE'RE USING A REAL PUCK AND HE'S STANDING ABOUT 15 FEET DOWN FROM ME. I KEEP HITTING THE PUCK AS HARD AS I CAN BUT I CAN'T RAISE IT. KYLE IS JUST STANDING THERE ACTING ALL SUPERIOR AND GIVING ME INANE ADVICE AND PASSING THE PUCK BACK TO ME EACH TIME IT SLIDES OVER TO HIM.

ANYWAY I REMEMBER I GOT ALL FRUSTRATED AND DECIDED THAT THIS WOULD BE IT - I WAS GOING TO RAISE THAT FUCKING PUCK. SO I WIND BACK AND TAKE MAYBE THE HARDEST SLAPSHOT OF MY LIFE. THE PUCK RAISES MAGICALLY. UP UNTIL THIS VERY SECOND NEITHER KYLE OR I REALIZE THAT IF I EVER DID GET THE PUCK IN THE AIR, KYLE WOULD BE IN SOME TROUBLE.

TIME PRETTY MUCH SLOWED DOWN FOR ME. THE PUCK IS A GOOD TWO FEET IN THE AIR AND IS MAKING A BEE LINE FOR KYLE'S DICK. I REMEMBER SEEING KYLE'S EYES OPEN UP VERY WIDE, AND I SEEM TO RECALL MYSELF SHOUTING OUT SOME OBVIOUS INSTRUCTIONS ABOUT HOW HE NEEDS TO STEP ASIDE RIGHT NOW.

KYLE ISN'T VERY BRIGHT, AND IS NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO MY INSTRUCTIONS. I CAN SEE THE GEARS TURNING IN HIS LITTLE BRAIN, AS HE TRIES TO COME UP WITH SOME SORT OF SOLUTION TO THE IMMINENT DANGER HE IS IN. "STEP ASIDE, KYLE, STEP ASIDE!!" I AM YELLING EARNESTLY.

KYLE EYES THE PUCK ONE LAST TIME AS IT FLIES A BILLION MILES AN HOUR TOWARDS HIS BALLS, AND AT THE LAST MINUTE DROPS TO HIS KNEES AND TAKES THE FUCKING THING IN THE FOREHEAD. KNOCKS HIM RIGHT THE FUCK OUT.

You need more don't you....

Oh yeah, thanks Jen !

AND just in case you think this is a one-off Fuck you, my comics are gold will prove the man's enduring genius.

This morning, I was reading the first in a set of readings for my production class. The article is called "Principles of Community-Based Action Research" it's all upbeat and pro-active about research that "provides people with the means to take systemic action to resolve specific problems."

The professor or someone, had added a bunch of marginalia to the reading before it was copied for class, so there are little comments littered around the text.

On one page, directly under the sentence :

"These values and assumptions are built into a set of guiding principles that can facilitate a democratic, participatory, liberating, and life-enhancing approach to research."

it says;

"fuck-off"

Oookay, so I won't get my hopes up too much then.

Obsessed with the song "On Every Street" by Dire Straits today.

I am not sure what mood I am in, there have been many a stupid blog entry which passed through my head. I have no time to write anything too serious. Maybe I am a little worried about what would come out if I decided too write seriously, let's call it the Lenny Bruce Syndrome.

Just watch this video: (By the way yes, Mark Knoppfler is adorable with his awful hair and that headband.)Don't get bored and stop watching you have to hear the guitar at the end or the point is absolutely lost. It starts at 3:20 - get a hanky ready. My favorite comment "Roar... Makes you wanna hug everyone you like :p" yeah exactly. Although, based on the extreme 80's fashion, play the song in another window, unless you love man-perms.